Ya Rabb, Please Forgive Me..

Ya Rabb, Ya Goffururrohim..

I know that You must have known about my condition

I know You’ve been watching me

Protecting me

Guiding me

Reminding me

All in mysterious ways that I can never understand

Now I assume that You already know my feelings

It’s so confusing

Depressing

And Torturing..

At first I didn’t notice the cause

I was lost

I felt lonely in the crowded

Tried to find out why

Tried to scream

To ask

What was really happened to me

At first, I didn’t know the cause

I was just lost..

Maybe now I understand what the cause is

Why I still lose

Still confuse about this hole in my chest

That hurt like a fresh gash

Bleeding..

The cause is,

I’m misguided in my own sins

I’ve made so many mistakes

Ignoring You

Cheating Your rules

Undermining Your bless

Not pay attention to Your mercy

God.. Please forgive me..

I’m lost in my own sins

I’m drowning in it

God.. Please help me..

Please pull me up to the surface

So that I can see Your shining bless

Breathing Your freshen mercy

Thanking for Your forgiveness

Grateful of Your guidance

I know I’ve been silly

I’ve been such a jerk

I’ve been such a bloody hypocrite

I want to change to be a better person

But in the other hand I’m so weak

I’m not strong enough to resist the temptation

I’m so easy to break up

I need You, Ya Rabb..

Help me out

I’ve cried for my sins

But it doesn’t change anything

My sins keep haunting me in the background

It’s like I could never escape from it

I’ve asked for Your forgiveness so many times

But I’ve done my mistakes over and over again

Which is the most miserable irony of my life

Ya Rahmannurrohim..

Please help me to have a full calm life

I just wanna be happy

Not being haunted by my own sins like this

Calm me down, Lord..

You’re the only one who hold my soul

Who hold my life and my destiny

Calm me down..

Amin..